I Made It!

Finally, I made the 75 pounds lost mark! I was down 3.2 pounds this week! These plateaus are sure stranger as time goes on, but thank goodness they ARE plateaus! Now to celebrate! No time to post more today. I hope to be back later next week though! See you then!

Anyone for Breakfast?

Here's a little quiz for you. Which cereal is healthier? Which of these is a good choice? Which is a bad choice? I've saved a few empty boxes of several cereals that have recently been in our house. Remember, we have a ten year old that lives with us. He eats 99% of these cereals and I have them once in a while for the other 1% of the mix.

Honey Nut Chex: The box says it is "Gluten Free" and whole grain but it has honey and nuts, so it must be too sweet and higher in fat because of the nuts, right?

1. The serving size is 3/4 cup
2. Calories are 120
3. Fat is 1g
4. Sugars are 9g
5. Fiber is 1g.

Corn Chex: This is also "Gluten Free" and is "with Whole Grain Guaranteed". It is CORN though. That can't be good, can it?

1. The serving size is 1 whole cup
2. Calories are 120
3. Fat is only a half (.5)g
4. Sugars are 3g
5. Fiber 2g

Not bad!


Life Cinnamon: "Made with Whole Grain". This stuff tastes good without adding milk!

1. The serving size is 3/4 cup
2. Calories are 120
3. Fat is 1.5g
4. Sugars are 8g
5. Fiber 2g

It is also "Heart healthy" and "an excellent source of B-Vitamins" according to the package.

Mom's Best Naturals - Honey Grahams: Now this should be super healthy! It is in the specialty isle with all the health foods and is a lot more expensive than the others. It too, has whole grains and is made with "all natural ingredients".

1. The serving size is 3/4 cup
2. Calories are 130
3. Fat is 3g
4. Sugars are 10g
5. Fiber 1g

Wait a minute?!? The health food is the most in calories, fat, sugars and lower in fiber than most of the others? What's up with that???

It gets more interesting when you read the ingredients. The health food cereal has corn meal as its first ingredient. The other three list different whole grains as their first ingredients.

By the way, the Honey Nut Chex, and the Mom's Honey Grahams both listed two types of sugars in the first five ingredients. The Corn Chex and Life cereals listed one sugar as the third ingredient. (I only went through the first five ingredients for this)

When looking at all the ingredients:

• The Life cereal listed ONE source of sugar in its ingredients.
• The Corn Chex cereal listed TWO sources of sugar.
• The Honey Nut Chex listed FOUR sources of sugar.
• The Mom's Honey Grahams lists SIX sources of sugar.

The FDA doesn't make manufacturers list all their sugars together. The more types of sugars you can put in a product the lower down the list they appear. The Corn Chex would be lowest in sugar because they actually use less overall sugar than the others. Clear as mud? Of course not! It seems the more of a challenge it is to figure these labels out the more we are kept in the dark. I hate having to do my homework, but I need to, in order to put the best foods in MY mouth for ME!

By the way, good old oatmeal is a tad higher in calories and fat. It has 150 calories per serving and 2.5g fat. It wins in the sugar category with only 1g of sugar, and in the fiber category with 4g of fiber. One more note about oatmeal is interesting when comparing it to these other cereals. The total list of ingredients in Life Cinnamon cereal was a whopping 27! Mom's Best had 18 ingredients (so much for "all natural" meaning simple), Honey Nut Chex had 12, and Corn Chex had only 8! But, oatmeal has ONE ingredient.

The moral of this story is that you really can't judge a book by its cover much less a cereal box by where it is located in the store, or what it says in bold print on the box. You have to read the ingredients too. Everyone needs to decide what is best for themselves. I look at calories and fat first and always prefer simpler foods with fewer ingredients.

Please pass the oatmeal!

(note: all these figures were without adding milk)

Book Review: Water With Lemon

I just finished "Water with Lemon" last night. The book is written in a fictional way with the main character, Karen, coming to terms with her life, marriage, and her battle with weight loss.

The eight habits that are introduced in the book are great common sense ways to incorporate in your weight fighting lifestyle.

Overall, it was a fast read. It was hard for me to combine the thought process of fictional story with non-fictional facts.

I liked some of the ideas to help with weight loss in this book. Although I got tired of reading "water with lemon" that was almost on every page of the book! I exaggerate, but it sure was mentioned a LOT! hahaha

I will take away some of the ideas from the book, like making large batches of meals and freezing some to make your own 'fast food' meals easier. I might slice up a lemon and put it in a container in the fridge. Then when I get water, I will put a slice in the bottom of the glass before adding the water. It sounds refreshing!

I went to the web site that is mentioned in the book. There I found the "Lickety-Split" cookbook. I thought this was an old ancient book that the character, Fowler, had found. It isn't. It is a full blown cookbook that the author made to go with the book. I didn't like that the prices for this cookbook are, what I consider, very high.

If you can wrap your head around the story parts of this book and keep it separate from the diet plan, I think you might enjoy it. It is a predictable and easy plot to follow. I am sure the plans, the habits mentioned, would help out some to tackle their weight loss methods.

I will take away from this book some 'food for thought' and possibly incorporate it into my regime. I won't spend the money on their web site, for any of the companion books or DVD's though! I will subscribe to her newsletter to see if it is a helpful thing. If it is more a sales gimmick, I will not keep using the newsletter though!

I still like sparkpeople.com the most. It has been a good fit for me and my style of making healthy changes in my life. Everyone should read or look at all types of different things to find what fits or what works best for them, personally. Everyone of us is unique. Our plans of attack should be unique too!

I hope you enjoyed this book review. I am working on another one already! Be kind to yourself today. We are all so lucky to have another day to live!

Dagnabit!

Well piffle! I gained this week. I am not sure why. I am up 1.8 pounds though. I looked at what I have been doing this past week and nothing jumps out at me yet as a direct cause for the gain.

Oh well. This has happened before and I am not going to let it get to me! I am still happy about where I am at and excited about where I might be going!

In the past I've gone up a tad and then dropped a huge amount. Maybe this is one of those types of plateaus? They say the body does not give up metabolism changes easily. It hangs on to every fat cell it can, keeping them nice and plump!

The only things I can think of that might affect me is that I have been making it a point to eat breakfast. I have added a tablespoon of sugar a day to my diet. I have also added a pat of butter a day. I honestly would like to think that this would not pile the pounds on so easily! This week has been different, exercise wise too. Next week I will be back on a more normal routine as there are no meetings or appointments going on that might slow things down for the week.

NEVER GIVE UP!!! That is the motto for this week. See you back here soon! I have more book reviews coming and maybe some recipes.

I still feel great! So no sad frowny faces today! Have a GREAT weekend everyone!!!

Walking is too much fun!

I've been walking that trail I found, instead of going to the gym. The weather is so cool out and I just couldn't resist walking instead of going inside a building! Tomorrow I will go to the pool though, as I need to do some stretching and pool workouts that don't jar the joints as much.

This morning I did a hair over three and a half miles!!! I ran a little bit too, so it was quite the workout. I've felt invigorated all day. This is just a smidgen over 5K, so I think I can start considering entering a race someday. I don't want to do it to win, but I want the tee shirt! hahahaha! I might even do something like the Run for the Cure. I wonder if I would look good in pink? I wonder if I could get sponsors? There is a lot to think about and hope for, next year. I think this is added motivation for me to continue on this new life I am leading!

I had such a treat today! I have needed a pair of in-between jeans. I am right between fitting into the skinny jeans I have in the closet and drowning in any of the larger sizes. Today I took all those baggy saggy fat jeans to the thrift shop and bought myself a pair of perfectly fitted jeans. I also found a gorgeous two piece light sweater set for spring. I can almost wear it now, but would feel better if I were still smaller in the hips and waist before wearing this new set. Oh, I forgot to mention that I had a 20% off coupon to use in exchange for the donated jeans. My purchases today were less than ten bucks.
I tried everything on at home and then started looking in my winter closet for a light weight long sleeved shirt to wear for the rest of the day. I found my old Halloween witchy tee shirt and put it on. The last time I wore it was over a year ago and it was too tight on me then. It hangs on me now! It is comfy though, and I will keep it to wear around the house when I want to wear comfy stuff. (I still think it is SO cool that this shirt just hangs on me though!!!)

I love being skinny(er)! Even if I am still overweight, I don't care what others say, I FEEL skinny!

Fish tonight and weigh-in tomorrow. I hope I've reached that big goal weight that is just a hair's breath away!!! If not, I will try again next week!

See ya next time!

LOOKIE What I Found in my Back Yard!!!

They have closed down some railroad tracks near my house. I now have a new route to add to my walking. It is fun to not always be on asphalt! I even saw a fawn! This is sooooo cool!

I found out that walking on this type of terrain is a real workout too! My knee didn't hurt but I was huffing and puffing as if I were running! As soon as I was back on the streets, my knee was twinging again. I will be utilizing this trail a lot more on future walks!

I hope your weekend is going well. We started the morning off with a moment of silence to recognize the day. We are so lucky. Those folks that passed away on 9-11 didn't have the choice to improve their lives and to finish living them to their potentials. We have no excuse to abuse ourselves. Let's keep getting healthy and remember just how fortunate we are.

Almost There!

Less than a half pound to go and I will have lost a total of 75 pounds! I thought I had reached that today at weigh in but when I went back and redid the math, I found out I was wrong. lol I was NOT upset about this though because I had lost two pounds since last Saturday!
I hope to write something more witty later this week. It has been a busy day. One little thing I want to mention though, is that I just found out there will be a new walking trail so close to my house that I can use it often! I am very excited about this!

Hang in there, and don't EVER give up!
See you soon!

More than just a book review

How about TWO book reviews? (and more) After getting yesterday's post done, I decided to come back today and do more! First up is:

"The 17 Day Diet" by Dr. Mike Moreno

I am always a skeptic when it comes to these types of books. This book was no exception. Does it work? Yes. Is it magic? No. This is just another example of the latest fad diet out there. They've launched this book with a full media blitz on TV and the Internet. CBS News, ABC TV, Dr. Phil, The Doctors and more have had stories about it. There is a web site you can join up with. There is a workbook and a DVD you can buy, to go with the book. With promises of rapid weight loss and astounding results, it is easy to see the lure.

Save your money.

It is basically a low calorie diet (one day's suggested menu was under 1200 calories for the whole day). It is heavy on veggies, light on fruits, and low on carbs. You can eat a lot of proteins, as long as they are chicken, fish, and other lean meats. You don't have to actually count calories, which will appeal to many. It is divided up into three - 17 day chunks that change up your foods a little. (quote) "But you do have to accept that this won't be a pleasure diet. You've got to stop eating unhealthy crap." This is nothing new, but rather just a different way of stating the tried and true, 'calories in, calories out' that ultimately works for most people. They also have exercising in the program, so it really is not anything new and ground breaking.

The "maintenance" plan is: (quote) "....a program of eating that lets you enjoy your favorite foods on the weekends, while eating healthfully during the week."
Well duh! Doesn't this amount to cutting calories? And don't you think folks will read into this that they can do fast food all weekend and still lose weight?

So I would not spend the money to buy into this, even though it does work, it isn't anything new or special or magical. If you are looking for something to follow that is laid out for you, then this might be for you. Just be aware that it IS brand new and comes across as being the diet fad of the year...next year will bring a new and different plan with a catchy name. I am sure it will make money for the doctor and might help some folks out as well. Most of these fad diets will work to some extent, but they are not a new miracle cure for obesity.

Speaking of obesity...someone said to me this week, "You don't look obese anymore!" I suppose some folks would take that as a slam, but I took it as a full blown compliment! My mind's eye still sees a fat woman. It is only when I glimpse the hall mirror, in passing, that I see this stranger looking back at me! Who IS that woman???
Before the next book review, I wanted to mention something else to you. I've been enjoying my Dannon vanilla Greek yogurt a bit too much. I was having two or three a day, mostly after supper, as my dessert. Heck, I was buying this stuff by the CASE! I finally figured out why. It has 18 (that is EIGHTEEN) grams of sugar in it! That is TWO THIRDS more sugar than plain yogurt. (Plain has 6 grams of sugar) No wonder it tasted so good! Guess who isn't buying this any more? I still like Greek yogurt the best, but it will be Yoplait or Dannon PLAIN Greek, from now on. I will add the flavorings myself and not the sugars!!! I hate when I have to give up my indulgences!!! I hate being fat, more!

Book review #2:"The Skinny- What Every Skinny Woman Knows About Dieting

(And Won't Tell You!)"
by Patricia Marx and Susan Sistrom

What a fun book this was! Patricia Marx actually is a prolific writer, usually with a wicked sense of humor too! This book has a lot of funny material, interlaced with real truisms! Some of the chapters are:

• Making It Look Big
• Calories Per Minute
• The Best Way to Look Skinny
• What to Do if You Really, Really Need to Lose Five Pounds in Five Minutes
• Naked Eating
• Space Travel
• What to Do if You Accidentally Drink a Coke Instead of a Diet Coke
• No, Really, what to Do if you Accidentally Drink a coke Instead of a Diet Coke
• The Outside vs. the Inside of a Food
• Why You Should Never Tell Your Mother You're on a Diet

There are many, many more chapters.

In the "Calories Per Minute" (CPM) chapter, I took this excerpt: "The difference in calories per ounce is marginal, but the pistachios with shells are unquestionably the Skinny Choice. (The CPM for pistachios can be even lower than 80 because you are likely to get stuck on a particularly hard-to-crack nut or even break your nail and have to stop eating nuts for a while. If you are very lucky, you will slice open your finger on a shell and have to go to the hospital, where you will cause the CPM to go down even farther. We advise, therefore, to buy the pistachios nuts that must opened with power tools.)"

I would get this book and have it by your nightstand to read. The chapters are short and funny. You would go to bed with a smile on your face! Your partner will wonder what you're thinking, so share the book with him or her too.

That is it for today and for the rest of this week! I am still working out the kinks in my new routine and trying to decide the best plan of action. I see my doctor on Tuesday and will be asking him questions too.

Enjoy your day and have a safe and fun filled Labor Day weekend y'all!

Catch as Catch Can

I have SO much to say and I keep putting off writing in this blog! That only made things worse, so here goes, pimples and all!

SMOKING: I think I have that kicked again. I was smoking for about ten days and it has been almost a week now, since I quit...again! I plan to not start next time until I am 75.

WEIGH IN: A shocking 4.5 pound loss! I keep thinking the scale has to be broken. I've been limping along with one pound (or less) gains and losses for weeks now. I hope the new exercise program is what is kicking off the pounds! The food is staying the same.

VIRTUAL 5K: Yes, that button on the right says I have entered "Trick or Treat Trot - Virtual 5K" over on sparkpeople.com. I am becoming a convert to their website. It has more than I need and I only have to take what I want from their site, to use to my advantage.
Not long ago I read a book about a lady who ran her first 5K. I have seen stories on TV about how people who started to take care of themselves and exercised, often ended up challenging themselves to a race. This one is perfect because I can run it alone. Correction: run/walk, not run. And I am not sure about the running part of it either.

DOCTOR: Annual checkup is right after Labor Day. I wonder what the doctor will say about the changes in my life? I also plan to ask him about my knee. I don't want to blow it out and get laid up! It is twinging, but it doesn't last long. Best to ask this doctor, who has seen x-rays of this same knee. I want his opinion about me continuing the running part of my exercises.

EXERCISES: I am trying to do Yoga (one hour) and 5K training on the treadmill for 30 minutes, on Mondays. Tuesday is 60 minutes of pool aerobics. Wednesday repeats Monday with Yoga and treadmill. Thursday is pool aerobics. Friday is weight machines, treadmill and maybe a little pool stretching. Saturday is pool. Sunday is a wild card day. I either walk in the neighborhood, or go to the pool for an hour, or take the day off. I am also walking to get my son at school each day. That adds about 20 minutes of walking.

I guess I am a bit over my 60 minute a day regime, huh? I actually might be pushing myself a bit too much though. I don't know yet. I currently, worry about two things. One is getting hurt. The other is...what do I do when I reach goal weight? Assuming I actually DO reach goal weight, what then? How will my lifestyle be then? The possible end IS in sight and I wonder...what will it be like?

How DO skinny people live? Do they eat nothing? Do they ever exercise? Why does it seem they can eat tons of food and not gain an ounce and I catch a whiff of cheesecake and gain ten pounds? These are the mysteries of life I guess.

I hope to have a few book reviews soon. I just needed to get some of this other stuff out of my head. It is crowded enough in there!

See ya next time!

What the @#^&%&%##*%

Another gain today. What have I done wrong? I checked my foods and the calories are not there. I know I exercised more than normal this week. On Tuesday on a different scale, it showed a hugs loss. I was expecting several pounds gone today! They keep hanging on to me! Or am I hanging on to them???

So what was the problem? I've been eating more yogurt than normal (three or four for 'dessert') and eating it shortly before bedtime. How can THAT be the issue? I have done that before.

I am not sure. Thank goodness it is only a half pound-ish.

This next week I plan to do Yoga on Monday and Wednesday. I plan to stay on task with my foods. I also will not buy strawberries because they led to a feeding frenzy this week of strawberries and yogurt. It works so well here to keep the foods I crave the most, out of the pantry and fridge.

See you next week!

The Summer's End

In case some of you worried, I am doing fine. I have stopped smoking again and don't plan to use that terrible crutch for a long time, if ever!

With that and the end of summer there are so many changes coming up! I love it! I am back at the center and scouting out new ways of exercising. I plan to try a variety in order to stir things up!

I also took advantage of the free blood pressure, weight, and health check-up today. This happens each Tuesday. I was tickled to find out that I had lost 17 pounds over the past ten weeks. I did it! I made it through in flying colors! Yay me! :D

I hope your summer is ending on a positive note! I adore autumn and can hardly wait for the weather to change. More walks with Ziva sound divine!

Have a great week...one step at a time.

Talking Sense

I am talking some sense into my brain. I need my old pal Eeyore to tell me to knock it off and get back into the healthier lifestyle I have been working towards.
What happened? Not much. I did gain a whopping point four pounds. That is less than a half pound. This past week has been rough. We sold our RV last weekend and it was so very hard to let go of it! We had had such fun in it as we traveled throughout northern California, as musicians at various renaissance faires! Then when we were forced out of CA and moved to Arkansas, it was our home for six weeks.
Anyway, we were very attached to that silly hunk of fiberglass and metal, but it was time to let it go. The process really went well. We sold it to the first party that looked at it. The process also triggered a LOT of emotions.

In the midst of all this, I have basically plateaued on the weight loss. I tried to say it didn't bother me, but it did. I did a stupid thing. I turned to my old nemesis, the cigarette. Yes, I hate to admit this, but I have started smoking again. Shame on me! I could cite all the excuses about the emotional roller coaster of late, the fact that my husband smokes, and that this last week of summer vacation was extra challenging to get my exercises done. These are all just excuses though.

Today I will end it by sticking a patch on and stopping the insanity!

I redid my goals and such on sparkpeople.com this morning. This chart shows my progress over the summer:

This is a good thing! The chart shows a downward swing all summer. With school back in session tomorrow, I will now be back at the center and plan to change up my exercise routine. I won't put in longer session, but I will amp up the intensity. The almost 70 pound loss since last fall/winter has left me more fit and stronger! My knees are doing very good and it is time to push myself a bit more. I am researching my plan of attack.

I made a new chart today and set a goal to be in the one hundreds by Christmas. I cannot imagine that! I CAN achieve it though!

Scold me if you must over my slip up, and share with me, getting back on track. This is just a little track repair job that I need to do and WILL do!

See you next week!

Bits and Pieces

I figure that if I learn something that I didn't know, there may be others who don't know either! That is why I am writing this entry today.

What I recently read about was in regards to ingredient labels on various foods. Most of us know that the manufacturers list the foods in order of most to least. If a food is mostly water, water is listed first. If a food is mostly say...peas, then peas would be listed first.

Here's the kicker though...(unless this has changed and I didn't catch it)....say you are reading a food label and you see fructose listed as the tenth ingredient. This seems pretty good, right? The sweetener is way down there. Let's say the 12th ingredient is molasses. Cool, right? The sugars are way down the list of ingredients. This must be a good food, right?

Wrong!!! Because the manufacturer does not have to list all sugars together, they can use several different types of sugars to make it seem like smaller amounts, therefore they are way down on the lists. IF they had to list ALL sugars as one group, you would find sugars/sweeteners, a lot higher up on the list of ingredients.

I hate reading labels. I hate that the manufacturers do this. I totally understand why they do though! Let's hope this changes in the future and if we can, help that change to go through!

Meanwhile, keep reading those labels!!!

I have spent most of the summer at the local swimming pool with my ten year old son. I always put in an hour of mild aerobics and had been going about five times a week for an hour each time. I never feel like it is a hard workout, but it is more than I ever used to do!

Next week my boy goes back to school and I am free to go back to the gym to exercise. (I am lucky and have a local Sr. Center that has a full gym and pool and is VERY affordable) I know there will be a major difference in the intensity of my workouts!

Here in central Arkansas, it has been a blistering hot summer with temps over 100° for most of June and July. Temps have been in the high eighties and humid, even in the early mornings until today. I saw 70° on the thermometer and headed out. I haven't walked outside since about May!!! I dodged some rare rain showers and did a walk of 1.7 miles! I was pleased to see that all the pool work wasn't too soft on my body and that I even RAN for one minute! ME!!! I don't run! Of course I don't wear shorts either. hahaha

I am now just starting to fit into sizes 18-20 after starting out in sizes 26-28. It feels SO good to fit into smaller clothes again!!! I am glad I saved my most favorite 'skinny' clothes, like the bell bottoms from my wedding! I should be wearing them on a regular basis, this fall!

It has been super hard to let go of the 'fat' clothes though! I never have let them go in the past because I figured I would fail and would need them again. I am taking away that excuse this time. :D

I was able to sell a few clothes but most of the time I have been donating them. I wish some could be donated to me! (a friend did just give me a couple things, a few days ago...most were still too small, but at least I have something to look forward to!) I don't buy a lot of clothing right now and haven't bought anything new, other than unmentionables and a swimsuit for aerobics water classes.

I plan to reward myself with something extra special, clothing-wise, when I reach my goal weight. You won't find it at Wal-K-Targ stores either! lolol

Measuring Up

Later today I plan to take my measurements. I don't do this often because I find that while I DO lose the pounds, I don't lose the inches yet. At least not to MY standards!

I lost three pounds last week!

That would be three of the above photo or one of the picture below:

That burger doesn't even look good! (shudder)

I have been busy this week. There is one more week of summer vacation left for my son. Once he is back in school, I am back to the center! I am looking forward to changing up my exercises. I was shocked at this week's loss too! I wonder what will happen when I start doing more cardio and weight lifting?

I want to remind you to keep reading those food labels too! The manufacturers are getting sneakier and sneakier!!! Recently a food was found that sounded really really good! It was low in calories and fats but presented itself as a tasty treat. In reading the fine print, however, it was noted that the calories and fat listed were for a half serving. If you hadn't noticed it, you would have eaten enough for a whole meal!

I hate having to keep an eye on everything. I love my weight loss and this new me more! Love yourself more than food today! See you next week!

Oh Poor Me...NOT!!!

Sometimes I really DO feel like poor Eeyore. So sad. So down in the dumps. This journey though, has shown me that a sad day is most often followed by a better day and then a happier day!

That is what happened a week ago, yesterday. After a .2 gain last Saturday, that really shouldn't count for much, this week I had a .6 loss. That really shouldn't count either, but I am counting it anyway! I think I am hovering around a plateau right now. I am mostly, okay with this. I know I need to change up my exercise routine a bit, in order to push for bigger losses again.

In two weeks my son goes back to school and I plan to do just that, change up my exercises! It is still very hot here in central Arkansas and I look forward to the days I can walk my dog outside again! Until then, once I am more free to go back into the gym at the center, I will keep exercising in the pool. It might not be doing much for weight loss, but I feel it is still keeping major weight gain from happening!

I am still riding the 'high' from being able to fit into those jeans this last week!

I am excited that I have this pair and two others that I saved from all those many years ago! I will be wearing them this fall and winter. I like them so much that if I lose too much and get too small for them and keep that weight off, I will have them professionally altered to fit. They are bell bottoms and I am such a hippy chick at heart!Don't be an Eeyore! Keep on with your personal program and KNOW that a better day always comes, IF you really WANT it to! Besides, who wants to be blue unless they are in the Blue Man Group?!!!

See you next week!

I am Doing Fine!

Just a quick hello! After that tough weekend I thought I should share that I am doing better. This morning I tried on clothes that I have saved for over 11 years. That is the blouse I wore when I got married! I admit I have a muffin-top above those jeans, but I could button them, zip them, and sit down in them, today! I will be wearing them this fall and winter, for sure! I tried those jeans on about three months ago and could not even button them!
Moral of the story: Never give up! I am NOT!

She IS Human, After All!

At Saturday's meeting I gained point two pounds. Ooooooooooooooooooooo! I am quitting. This isn't worth it. Why bother? I am a failure. I am bad. I suck. I am not worthy. So what?
At the meeting, someone said to me that I really was human, after all! Just because I have been successful these past eight months, doesn't mean I am a super hero! I did decide to take today off though. I have not exercised. I am still eating like I should. I am not giving up. I even had TWO cigarettes today because we found some, laying about! I won't have any tomorrow.

OMG! Does this blow your mind? See? I truly AM human and I DO have my better days and my not-so-great days. In the past, I would give up and gorge myself. I might smoke a pack of cigarettes. I might drink a bottle of wine. I am not doing that, this time. Tomorrow I will exercise, as I normally do. I might even add a bit of time to it, just to atone for being naughty today.

That is what this is all about! We are all human. We will have days like these. It is not an excuse to give up and lay down and die. At least it is not for me. I have lost over 60 pounds! I am not about to throw that away! I am not giving up.

See you next week.
Me, The Human

He Look-a Like-a Man!

Remember that comedy bit on "Mad TV"? Ms Swan would make comments, with her awful accent, in those hilarious skits. Anyway, I came across the above clip art and although it is a silhouette of a man, it still works.

I don't see myself as being the first one in line. I think I was there before the surgery back in'81 though. In my current lifestyle change program, I think I was most like number three or four. And now I think I am between five and six. Will I ever be an eight? I dunno. How about a nine? That is not even in this picture!

Have you ever wondered about your body image? You may have heard that anorexics see themselves as huge, fat, obese, people when they look in the mirror. They might be walking skeletons but they don't see themselves that way.

How do obese people see themselves? Are we so afraid to look into a mirror for more than a glance, that we don't really know what we see?
For many, myself included, it is a self esteem issue. For the past eight months, I have been working on my inside self, just as much as my outside self. Both selves are hard to deal with at times! Take a good long look at yourself in the mirror. I don't care if you have clothes on or not, but if not, please pull the curtains so you don't scare the neighbors!!!

It is easy to pick out what we don't like about ourselves. Make yourself pick out what you DO like! Always walk away from a mirror with a smile. It really will help you like yourself.

This also works with photographs. Take photos of yourself as you make changes in your life. Really see what you look good in and what makes you look worse. Learn
how to dress yourself in the most flattering ways.

These three photos of me are taken just a few weeks apart. There isn't that huge of a weight loss between the first and last one. The difference is in what clothes I am wearing and how I am wearing them! If you think you look better, you will carry yourself better and you will look better and feel better! It is one of those vicious cycles, but in a good way.

I was down another two pounds at my weigh-in yesterday. I was surprised again! I am afraid to let my guard down just yet. I know I am due for a plateau any week now. I don't know how I will handle that, when it happens. I am trying to keep a positive attitude and to keep looking at the new me, in the mirror. I think that will get me through a plateau and on to continued success!

That's all I have to share with you today. So get out and go for a walk or swim!!!

Perfectionism

There was a very good article in my Spark People newsletter this morning. It talked about everything in moderation. The last page of the article had this paragraph:

"By refusing to be a perfectionist, you can take most of the stress out of weight loss. You’ll see small problems as what they are—very small problems, not major calamities that mean you've blown it. You'll be able to find pleasure and satisfaction in the fact you’re learning as you go and doing a little better all the time. No more making things worse because your perfectionism caused you to write off the rest of the day or week after one little slip."

I suffer from a mild anxiety disorder and perfectionism issues used to trigger failure. It used to be if I ate one bite of a 'bad food' I may as well give up, forever. I bet a lot of folks think this way. I have finally gotten to where I recognize many of these triggers and have been able to overcome them more and more. I no longer see things as an absolute.

This morning I actually gave in to something that has been on my mind for a long time. My husband likes to get doughnuts every Sunday morning. Most of the time I pass on having any. This morning, I did not. This was my plate:
That is one eighth of a maple frosted cream filled Long John and a doughnut hole. One whole Long John has 425 calories and 11 grams of fat. I made it a plan to have just a little bit...just a little taste. Using a tool that we discussed in the weight loss support group yesterday, I took my time, eating the Long John. The trick is that you are supposed to savor and enjoy your food. You are not supposed to wolf it down as fast as you can! The faster you can eat, the more you can stuff in your tummy! Right?

I gave myself permission to eat the doughnut slowly. I managed to divide it into three bites. I actually did not eat the doughnut hole! In class yesterday, our Fearless Leader restated the fact that the first bite of food packs the most flavor punch. We taste the first mouthful of food the most intensely. This really is true. I found that third morsel of this Long John had little to no flavor. I could not even taste the maple frosting. In fact, the whole thing didn't taste as good as I had imagined. This made it easy to pass on the doughnut hole.
In a perfect world, it used to be that that bite of doughnut would mean failure. In a realistic world, it is not! I continue to strive to slow down and taste my food. It is one of the hardest things for me to learn. I have made some progress though. Think of the tortoise and eat slowly. Taste your food!!! And if your food is not satisfying to your palate, don't waste your calories on it. Toss it and find something more to your liking.
That is my advice for today! Now go for a walk, if the temperatures are cooler where you are. I am headed to the pool this afternoon. See you next week!

KABOOM!!!

I weighed in today. I thought I might be down a pound or two, but not three point six pounds!!! I made another milestone! Almost 63 pounds have gone away, over the past eight months!

I can hardly believe it! I plan to reward myself with a new swimsuit.

I was going to be all philosophical on today's posting too! You will have to forgive me though, because I am just so in shock over this milestone event!

I still worry about that fatter gal I left behind. I hope she retires now and leaves me to enjoy the rest of my life in a more normal and healthy way! I have a lot of work to do to get my brain in order too. My life constantly evolves and changes as the 'new' me emerges. It is true, what they say, you do feel almost reborn in a new body!

At night, when laying in bed, my knees hit each other now. I can feel my ribs and hip bones. It is all strange, this new body. I hate the saggy flabby parts and sometimes wish I had the money to get a few nips and tucks on my belly and underarms. I am just not vain enough to do that. I will have to get creative with my clothing. I know most people still see a fat woman walking around. I feel skinny though and what I feel...counts!

See ya next time!