Patience Grasshopper, Patience

Abby is not a patient person. She does not handle waiting too well. She wants it NOW!!! A lot of us want the pounds to go off our bodies, NOW too! It doesn't happen that way.

What does work is food journaling, a bit of exercising, and educating yourself as to portion sizes, calories per SERVING, and knowing the ingredients of processed foods. Abby had thought she could do without food journaling and she gained weight. A week ago, she started journaling again. When she weighed in, she found herself down FOUR pounds!!!

I can hardly wait to see what happens next week. Will she be down again or was this week just a fluke? 

Have a wonderful Labor Day Weekend y'all! And Walk-On.

Well flip my switch and call me Norman!

What the heck am I saying? I hardly know where to begin. How about with a cute picture of Abby with a toy spider to play with and to tease the cat with?

Abby has had a hard time of it. Things have been going sour for months now. Although she kept hanging on, she was loosing ground. One thing about Abby, she doesn't like taking pills. She thinks she is strong enough to deal with life on her own. She thinks she isn't SO depressed that she needs a pill to make her happy.

Then she fell apart . . . again. She had mild depression, anxiety attacks, panic attacks, crying way too hard for no real tangible reason, and was so miserable. She felt like she was under her own private rain cloud…all doomy and gloomy. She put on a good front though. She was in denial. She did not want to take any damn pills.

She wasn't suicidal. (You don't have to want to end your life to need help.) Abby just figured everyone was sad, every day. She felt very empty too. She bravely sought help and started taking a medicine that helped, but it made her very sleepy.

She could barely make herself go to yoga class, much less keep up with the ten minute a day walks. She was mad at herself for being this way. She went back to the doctor and tried a new pill. She isn't as tired now. Hopefully this new pill will help her with coping skills and get her back into the life she really wants to live.

* * *

It's funny how Abby has a lot of the same problems I have! I've been on my new pills for two weeks now. I am now in my studio more and have a bit more energy. I am still not happy with my level of alcohol intake although it is a LOT less and getting more-so.

I had something happen this past weekend that I really truly hope means I am headed back on the right path. I got a kick in the pants. I tried to put on a dress and it didn't fit. I love this particular dress. It really brought it home that I might only have gained 20 or 30 pounds, but it IS making a difference in my size. And I do NOT like this, not one little bit!

Today I felt that spark of renewal and rebirth. Today I felt that I might be able to make this life, MY life, on MY terms again. Keep your fingers crossed.

Oh, and walk on, even if only for ten minutes a day!

DIY: Fat Removal Surgery

I could not find out who the artist was. 

There are a lot of ways to think of this statue's message. Is it her inner beauty coming out? Maybe she is chipping away the fat, or wishing it was just as easy to lose weight by cutting it away? However you see it, it does make one pause and reflect. Or at least it caused ME to!

Walk-on!!!

Back from the Doctor

Lately I've been struggling with extreme fatigue. I finally allowed myself to spend the $20 co-pay to go see the doctor about it. I expected blood-work to be done and then be told it is all in my head. That is not what happened.

He said it was most likely a side effect of the meds I am on! He also said that some of the more recent weight gain could be a result of these meds too. Our plan of attack is to wean me off these and to try something else in a few weeks. He even offered me diet pills to jump start my weight loss. I declined them.

I really hope this works because I have become a major slug. I don't want to get out of bed in the mornings and can't wait to get to sleep at night. Then I sit around all day and watch old black and white TV shows. I don't want to go shopping or play in my studio. This is not me!

A FEW DAYS LATER: The meds must be about all out of my system. I was crying today at the sites of familiar views from the San Francisco area. I was watching some crime drama tv show. I get SO HOMESICK sometimes! I called in as doc said to and arranged for the new script to be filled. I do not want to get back to that sad weepy puddle again! I'll keep you posted on the results.

Someone asked me about sharing the meds I've tried. I tend to not do that because everyone reacts differently to different medicines. This will be the fourth one I will be trying. I actually took this over 17 years ago when going through a nasty divorce. I don't recall anything negative or positive about it. I like trying the older medicines that have long track records though.

I came across this the other day and found it kinda fun:

I am still leading the yoga class on Monday and Friday. For now I plan to keep on doing that. Other than that, life is pretty quiet with a busy autumn looming. I am looking forward to that!

Hope you are all doing well out there! Walk-On!