I am doing a lot better and have been for several weeks now. I don't have all the answers yet, but I am figuring out the questions better! To catch you up on a few things, I am off all meds now. Seems I am not the chronically depressed type person that needs to be on a medication to cope. Now I might need a short term zap now and then, but overall, I don't seem to need a full blown antidepressant.
Does this mean I am magically never depressed? Of course not! Does this mean I will never need to take a medication to help me over an especially stressful period in life? Piffle! I might need help in the future. The difference is that now I will be asking for short term help, not months' worth of scary pills.
Ok, enough depressing talk! On to other things that piss me off bug me. There was a blog post on a web site that I go to every Sunday, regarding eating disorders. I was a bit miffed that most of it talked about the anorexics and bulimics and not the obese. The posting had a link to an eating disorder self test and help for "College Students" and "General Public". I don't have a disorder, according to their tests. So what DO I have? I didn't get as fat as I was from breathing fumes from the Fat Fairy's magic wand! Where am I going with this? I am just complaining. Being chronically overweight is an eating disorder. I think it is still thought of differently though, than those who starve themselves or throw up after binging. Just sayin'.
I have also been trying to figure out what my Happy Weight will be. At one time, I thought 5'9" and 150 pounds would be superb! That is what the charts said I should be at…at least when I was in my 20s. Of course that doesn't work quite as well for a woman who is almost 60. Now I think the ideal weight would be 175.
That is the IDEAL weight, I am not saying it is a realistic one for me, nor what my Happy Weight would be. Right now my Happy Weight would be anything back in one-derland!!!
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| Yippee!!! 199.999999 pounds! (someday soon) |
Last week I went for a long walk on the trails with a friend of mine. I hadn't been out there for months! I forgot how good that can make me feel!!! I felt so good that I went out again on Friday. Following is the first of what I hope to be many, Trail Tails:
We've had a bout of late spring type weather. This means temperatures in the 60s and 70s. The sun was shining and the time was right to get out and breath some clean fresh air! I was stoked and ready to enjoy my long walk. I had no idea how badly I had missed my trail!!!
If Ziva could have human expressions, she would have had the most astonished look when we turned to go to the trail instead of staying on the streets. "Really Mommy? We are really going down to the REAL trail???!!!! Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!!!" And she bounced around me as we headed down the hill to the trail head.
It was downright criminal, how wonderful that day was! The sun was shining and the birds were singing! There were some early spring flowers poking their heads out. Granted there weren't any butterflies, but there should have been, as nice out as it was!
There was one scary part of the trail. We heard a noise off to our right. As we neared the area I expected to perhaps see a deer! Then I heard voices. I tightened my grip on Ziva's leash and was on guard for any funny business.
All of a sudden, from out of the bushes I was attacked by a Ginger!!!! "ACK! RUN ZIVA, RUN AWAY!!!!"
Oh the horror of it all! We barely escaped with our lives! Gingers are very scary beings. I've heard all the horror stories on South Park.
Ziva says "Mom, it looked like a kid with red hair, just cutting a branch off a tree."
I don't believe Ziva. She is a dog. I am a human. I am the smarter one!
Tonight we have winter weather threats again, for later in the week. I know those in the north are having it a tougher, so you'll have to believe me when I say that here in the south, this is pretty rough. I hope we don't get snowed in or iced in again!
When the weather turns nice again, may all your trails become happier ones! Sunshine makes everything happier! Well, unless you're in a drought state. Or the desert, with no water. Or you are sunburned. Then it isn't as happy.
Walk-on!
2 comments:
SO glad to hear things are going better!
And interesting about the site skipping over the whole issue of over eating... I guess because unless it's "binge" eating disorder don't think obesity itself is recognized as an eating disorder. It's also so common in the US population that it would mean almost half the people would qualify! However, that doesn't mean there isn't a huge psychological component and it's great that you've been so proactive about changing your thinking and habits.
Fingers crossed for more sunshine and walks for you!
Thanks for stopping by Crabby. I am STILL feeling strong, even though there are life events that are going on that are challenging me to maintain control.
It still amazes me, how much I have to learn about 'things' when I am almost 60. I thought my Mom had all these answers!!!! Now I realize she didn't, any better than I do!
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